“Getting your confidence up to approach women”
…There’s just a whole problem in that statement to begin with but this is a serious issue affecting millions of men.
Have you ever seen a beautiful woman and wanted to approach but you felt your physiology change? She was maybe just standing there but you felt butterflies in your stomach and you thought about some way to open and capture her interest?
I used to deal with these issues as well of being intimidated, nervous and self-conscious around beautiful women as well. Now there is no fear of any level of beauty; I can approach or not anytime and I frame it so that I can’t get rejected (so at worst case it’s a neutral transaction).
Unlike almost all of the seduction teachers and dating coaches out there, if you’re having these issues I don’t encourage you to ‘keep approaching’ so that you can start getting over the fear. Instead, let’s deal with the real root issues and get them sorted out so you don’t do any further psychological damage.
Yes, it’s important to make connections with women at adultfrinendfinder.com login but not necessarily if you’re playing a numbers game where the odds are always stacked against you. A game in which you’re disempowered to begin with and don’t know what you’re up against so you keep running into a brick wall. I don’t encourage continued ignorance anymore.
If you have to ‘get up the confidence’..was it there in the first place? It could have been with you normally, but not when you ‘responded’ to your perception of her beauty and what it means.
Who has the real power and who doesn’t stand a chance but fools mate ANY time the relationship is like this? You know the answers. She has the power because you gave it to her in your hidden yet true relationship with her.
You could try NLP, hypnosis and body language exercises and it may help a little but you’re still ignorant to the powers that you’re fighting against (I used to be too). The answer lies in relational dynamics; understanding the truth of the social, behavioral and relational reality between you and the woman.
You’re supposed to have ‘the power’ to begin with. If you go out there and keep approaching and then try to ‘prove’ to her that you have more value and power, it defeats the whole purpose. She knew you didn’t have it in the first place.
Sure, sometimes they might feel sorry for you or you might be interesting enough that they’ll give you ‘a chance’ but that’s too inconsistent and variable plus you always risk rejection.
There really is an initial relational ‘power game’ that exists. This is a game in which you must be equal or greater in relational power to her in the first place. If you’re not, she clearly has the favor and that’s not where it’s supposed to be; you will be struggling uphill because she is already not interested in you.
However when you show up with the power and continue to keep your power for yourself (not letting her be the stimulus to throw you off), then you have won the initial power game that most guys continue to lose at.
Then, she can trust you to be yourself because you have already proved to her that you are who you are. This makes everything easier and When this happens and she sees that you indeed are the stimulus (instead (instead of her), the real game can begin.
The answer to everything is just to BE that man of confident, high character at all times in relation to women and everyone else. That is what they are looking for anyways and they’ll sacrifice on your other shortcomings.
When you ‘are’ that man who is always confident in himself and knows his relationship to all other elements of power/beauty, then you can accelerate new relations anytime because you are close to what women want and they will help you nonverbally to lead them where they want to go.
That’s quite a difference than fighting against powers that you don’t understand, while continuing to diminish your clarity of manhood itself. If you have to ‘raise’ your confidence or put on a game face, that a variable and incongruent character anyways.
You have to be the rock of character as a man, unshakable and unvariable so that women can open up to you. It’s in the future that you can subtly let her know how much you might be interested. Be the model of attraction yourself.
When you keep ‘the power’ you can fearlessly approach to make a social connection so that she wonders if you’re interested or not. You can say anything, have her respond and get a better feel of your unshakable character and then it’s easier to take it from there.
After all, it’s the woman’s level of interest and attraction that matters, not yours. Sometimes all you’ll have to do is show up and let things happen.
The best way to meet high quality women anyways is through social networking; another big topic but it’s quite simple when you have the character strength to back it up.
You almost have to ‘let go’ and trust that your strong body language will take care of things and you’ll know the things to say instead of trying to learn those first.